How You Know Your Human BFF Is A Keeper- Hiding the Body

A few days ago I wrote a post about how my little red Australian Cattledog, Hilli, had passed away called “Death and Friends-Hilli Has Flown Away.”  I ended up placing her in the freezer at my friend Diana’s house  because I am in Indiana and it gets cold here. The ground is frozen. Frozen solid. You would need large equipment to dig a grave.

I am not afraid  to admit that this has given me a little anxiety.  It’s a huge favor and it’s a really big deal to me that she be honored for her lifetime of love and everything she’s ever been through. It also grosses me out a little bit.

Her response to my repeated THANK YOU! was totally classic.

She said “Everyone needs a friend that will let you keep a body in their freezer,”

I would totally do that for her too and she knows it.  How cool is that?

Our conversations are always the best too. The stuff we come up with would make hilarious Saturday Night  Live skits. We are a great Lifetime Television For Women movie about loyalty and friendship. We’ve both been through some garbage and our stories are similar. We just get each other.

We work the same shift and quite often depend on each other to keep the other amused and break the boredom or even vent or whatever comes up.  At least once in the shift I try to send a totally hilarious photo that I found on the internet that’s way too inappropriate for my Facebook.

So tonight, one of our co workers was bragging about how they had already been paid. Our automatic deposits don’t generally hit until at least 2am on Friday morning. Somehow, she claims, her check already hit the bank. Knowing her though, she just told us all that to laugh at how we would all check our accounts fifty times in the next hour.

This led to us talking about bills and kissing our pay checks goodbye the minute they even hit our accounts. Such is life. It then led her to disclose her mortgage payment at a house she doesn’t live at because she just got married.

This is also where Hilli is currently wrapped in a blanket and in several garbage bags, in her freezer.

Hello again anxiety.

This is what that conversation looked like..

Partner in crime.

Partner in crime.

 

In case you’re confused, the plan is to bury Hilli’s body, at a currently undisclosed location, where she liked to go hiking with me. It’s probably not legal and we aren’t going to ask for permission. It’s going to be a cover of darkness, plant shovels by the road, hide the car and hurry with a frozen beloved pet….

In reality if we got caught, we probably wouldn’t actually get in real live trouble considering our ties to local law enforcement. We would likely get the low or high brow reaction and probably an offer to help us dig. Seriously, who is going to scold us for this and mean it? I’m telling you, we are a made for television movie.

This is isn’t supposed to be funny but right now, I’m seriously smiling because I have a great friend who knows what matters and that’s the greatest feeling ever.  I’ve said that I keep my circle small. I would rather have a handful of amazing friends than two hands full of mediocre or just plain crappy ones.

Di is a gem and I am so overlywhelming grateful for her.