Have you ever come across a person who seems to have a back-handed, left-handed, snide, or otherwise insulting remark for seemingly everything and everyone? A person who just says things and you can’t help but lower your brow and give them the side eye, smirk combo as you go on about your day?
This likely describes a family member or a co-worker. For me, it describes a person whose opinion mattered, and up until this point, I had a desire to please and cared what they thought of me.
This past July, I reconnected with an old friend. It’s an odd relationship that has an explanation that I should save for another time. I will just say, like I did above, that I really respect this person and what they think of me. I take what they have to say to heart.
So much so, that this story actually happened just after Thanksgiving and I am still thinking about it. I am also still trying to let it go while I bite holes in my tongue. I am not sure that ever mentioning it would serve any kind of purpose.
Here’s what happened.
I reconnected with an old friend. Over the next few weeks we started to get more familiar and little by little, he started to chip away at my bubble and I started getting more comfortable sharing personal things.
I have always had an interest in writing. I excelled in creative writing in school. I carried the passion into my adult years. I loved to write poetry, short stories and then eventually, blogging became popular so I started a blog.
My current blog, the one you are reading, is probably my fourth blog. I have had these starts and stops mostly because I went through life changes (divorce) and in my transitions ( there were many) I lost my voice. Or at least I thought I did. Or I was worried about my ex husband stalking my space and that gave me stage fright.
On those blogs, I wrote a lot about my experiences being a mother to a child with Down Syndrome. Then, I wrote about being the single mother to a child with Down Syndrome. I also shared experiences from when I worked for the county police etc. I wrote a lot about my personal reflections in hopes that I could reach other women and girls who were facing some of the same challenges that I had made it through.
On several occasions, I had women reach out to me through post comments or e-mail to share their stories or say “Thank you,” because reading my posts reminded them that there was hope and that they were not alone.
Some of these women were pregnant with babies that were suspected of having Down Syndrome, new moms, recently divorced or whatever their story was. I was getting a lot of positive feedback.
I was published in the Huffington Post online. It was a humorous article that I had written about quirks and the human condition. While it wasn’t a Pulitzer Prize winning piece of literature, it was published in one of the more popular media sources at the time. Most important, people enjoyed it.
I don’t remember how many hits I got to my blog after that. I do recall looking at my stats one night and nearly going into a panic over what it was that was driving people to my blog in droves.
Dear God! What did I write?
Keeping in mind what I have explained above, I have always felt pretty good about the majority of the topics that I have written about. While I may not always use proper grammar and punctuation I think that I have always told the story and gotten my point across.
I know that there are those who don’t consider bloggers to be serious writers. That’s likely the majority of us. We do however, serve a purpose. If not to others and only to ourselves. We all started a blog for a reason. In my case, I did it as a means of therapy for myself and to help others. I have accomplished both.
Going back to the re connection to my old friend, I did mention to him that I enjoyed writing and that over the years I have been hot and cold with blogging and that I was currently revamping my blog. I also told him that I wrote reviews for trails and parks for the Outbound Collective. At one point, he knew that I was out taking pictures so that I could update an entry I made to the Outbound Collective.
I was proud of all of this. He seemed interested so I was comfortable sharing about it a little bit but I admit I didn’t go into full detail or even provide him with the web address for anything. He didn’t ask for it either.
Fast forward to that cold day in November where I reach out to see what he’s up to. I get half assed invited to meet for lunch with him and a reserve police officer and a couple of town officials that happened to pass through.
On my arrival, I was greeted by my old, dear friend, and told that we were being joined by a reserve police officer who “was also a real author, as in, had books published,”
Stab to the chest. It wasn’t just what he said but how he said it. I was taken back a little bit. I tried to decide how he meant this and if his intentions were locked up in the crappy tone that he had. I didn’t ask.
Here’s the thing. I never bragged about writing or having a blog etc. I mentioned it as something that I enjoyed doing. I never mentioned how many followers I had or site visits. I never even revealed the title of the blog or passed on the website address.
It was an awkward lunch. I don’t know if my darling old friend was in a mood or what. I got to meet and have lunch with this real live author. He was really nice and easy to talk to. I enjoyed that.
The Real Live Author gave me the short version of his resume and told me what books he had written and published. They exist. He is the real deal. After talking to him for awhile, it didn’t even seem odd to me, that a man this accomplished, was moonlighting as a reserve police officer.
I couldn’t help but wonder though, was he self published? What a bitter thought. It wasn’t his fault that my old pal had made the comment about being a “real live author”. Who knew if he meant it to come off that way. I am not going to bring it up.
The point of this blog entry to is to remind myself and others to keep on doing what you’re doing. We are important and serve a purpose in our own way. Don’t forget that a lot of people gather their information online from bloggers like you and I that have experience in whatever it is that they are looking for.
I really can’t afford to have a book published, but I can write article after article about my personal experiences as a single mother raising a child with Down Syndrome. I can go on and on about my battles with the public school system as much as I can about the joys of each milestone.
People all over the globe relate to me in so many ways and they relate to you too!
In closing, and I am not even kidding, my dear sweet friend gave me the “real live authors” book as a Christmas gift. I wish I could reveal who the author is and the book that I received but I can’t count on anyone not mentioning it in conversation.
And I know how some of you can be *chuckles*
I hope everyone has a great week!